Top Ten Things to Remember When Attending Punk Concerts in Very Small Venues

So, it's been a while since I've blogged it up. As such, and because I'm sick of writing about my life, I thought I'd provide some more helpful tips and hints for all of you veteran or aspiring concert goers.

Top Ten Things to Remember When Attending Punk Concerts in Very Small Venues

(*this entry does not aspire to be similar to David Letterman; it, in fact, aspires to be an extra helping of High Fidelity listings)

1. Hearing. There is less space for large sound to exist in small venues. Ear plugs - although one may be labeled a pansy before the concert begins and less than "fashion friendly" - are smart as all get out... unless you enjoy excessive ringing in the ear's for more than 24 hours.

2. Being Stoned. If you like to smoke a little reefer, you're an idiot, but don't let that get you down. Smoke it on up. However, getting so tweaked that you wave your hands about your head and repeatedly smack other people in the face because of your utter incoherence is never a good idea because a) people don't care that you're a girl - they'll hit you anyways; b) someone's definitely going to end up taking advantage of you; and c) you might end up like this.

3. Clothing. Being the person to finally construct a shirt out of a chamois is not only a way to stave off embarrassing sweat stains, but also an ingenious way to make some extra money. I'd buy one online. Really. PayPal's awesome.

4. Paying Attention. Not paying attention is a great way to get a hold of some type of band memorabilia. For instance, I was messing around with my camera and got hit in the face with a drumstick. Having catlike reflexes and an iron-clad grip is also helpful for this category.

5. Camera. Readers might remember a previous post where I stated that I liked to keep my camera on my person at all times during some concerts. This is true. The advice I have to give now is that you probably should purchase some sort of camera case if you are not fortunate enough to develop the aforementioned chamois shirt because cameras may experience water damage.... which is actually swoobie damage. What? I'm just saying...

6. Crowd Placement. In a small venue, the crowd can still seem big and therefore surge and crush and pulsate. Perchance, if you find yourself smashed up, bosom, sweaty camera, and all, against a person whom you vaguely know from a class a few semesters ago, but only really through blogger, then just go with it. You are probably very close to the stage. It's all about the closeness at concerts.

7. Other People's Sweat. You'll wear it. Deal with it.

8. Invitees. If you happen to ask someone to go to a moshy-type concert with you last minute, and they've never actually heard of the band or been to a moshy-type concert, for the love of God, warn them about what will happen, what to wear, etc., especially if this person is homosexual because they might end up being the only gay man in a crowd of 400. (Thanks for being a good sport buddy!)

9. Questions. Questioning is always good. Questions in concert settings like, "When the hell are the Bouncing Souls coming on?!" or "Hey. Can you not put your hand there?" are great. Some questions are not good to ask in certain settings when you're surrounded by die hard fans of a 20 year old band, i.e., "Wait. Is it Bouncing Soul or Soulzzzz?" are just not smart things to say. Be a good little patron and hold your questions 'til the end.

10. Hair. If you're a girl with hair past mid-neck and fitting said hair into one, two, or three pony-tail holders is at all is possible, the pull your f***ing hair up. You make me want to rip it out. No one likes sweaty, stringy hair stuck to them in the pit.

Now, go out and enjoy some concerts.

Also, sorry about all of the hyperlinks. I just learned how to do it today. It's amazing!

Here's a link to a neat new artist. I've heard his name dropped twice in the past week.

I like this too.

And this.

Hoookay. Bye!

A Random Spattering of Thought due to High Engery and Mountain Dew via My Work Computer

The past few days have been surreal and happy. Surreal in the way that I'd forgotten what it's like to have multiple, life changing incidents occur all at the same time and have all of the aforementioned incidents be positive. Happy in the way that people tell me I'm glowing again and I feel like it. I woke up with a smile on my face this morning and it was a good moment.

Shall I expound? Yes. Yes I shall.

Yesterday, I was informed by a professor at NAU that I got a Graduate Assistantship. This basically means that I will save $12,000 a year in tuition and fees, I get paid to go to school, I get to teach a section of 1050 (1010 elsewhere) with my very own syllabus, books, and assignments, and, get ready for this, I get to have office hours. I'm going to have office hours. I'm 22 and I have office hours. That means, in deconstructionist terms, that I am going to have an office. How cool is that?

A certain C. Joe Willis wanted to make sure of the details of my GA position with the lady over them (...us?....weird) at NAU. He told her my name and she said (via Joe), "Oh. Sarah? She had that position within ten minutes of the start of the meeting. We don't not hire people like that." I was floored. After three rejections (grad school, not otherwise - that's a higher number), it's really, really nice to be wanted. I thought on the dates of my acceptance letter as well. NAU got my application on the 6th, 7th, or 8th. My acceptance letter was dated the 25th. I felt special.

Next Sarah-happy-making event. I bought my ticket to London today. I will be in Europe from July 10 to the 29th. I even got a deal: $967.60. Although, this does mean I will be on a place for something like 16 hours. But still, London is London.

Last happy-making-event for this blog, for there will surely be more to come later today. My dad wants to help me buy a condo for when I live in Flagstaff so that I can basically live rent free and establish mortgage credit. I really hope it works out because I've been searching Realtor.com, but even if it doesn't, it'll be okay. It'll be okay because I have parents who are willing to help me with something like this. It'll be okay because I know that I have people who love me and support me in any way they can. I can't believe I am so lucky.

I suppose in some way, all these event should make me feel older and more mature. They don't. True, they make me very happy, but I feel like a little kid playing dress up in a grown up's life. I know that I will be able to handle teaching and syllabizing and grading and grad-studenting, but, I feel very young. I don't know why.

All of this got me thinking. I realized how cantankerous (such a great word) I've been over the past four months. I fully feel that my stress was legitimate, but the purpose is not to just endure, but to endure it well. I feel badly that I may have been as horrible as I think I've been lately - or for months. I see an area I need to grow in my life, so I am glad of the time to self-reflect. For those of you who have supported me, loved me, and put up with me, thank you. Really. Thank you.

Life is cyclical and a balancing act, but for now, I shall bask the euphoria that comes with the blessings that are specifically designed for us and our experience here.

I'd Rather be Dead in California Than Alive in Arizona

I got accepted to grad school today. I'm going to be a graduate student! I'm getting a Master's degree! Grad school! New books, new people, new teachers, new chapter in my life!

Awwwwwwwwwoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After three rejection letters - Mizzou, Washington State, U of Utah - I got my first acceptance letter today. I still need to hear from one more school, but, as of August 2008 I will be living in Flagstaff, Arizona attending Northern Arizona University getting my Master's Degree in Literature.

Words cannot explain how happy and relieved and thankful I am to have to have security for the next two years of my life. 

No, this is not an April Fool's joke. I'm really going to grad school.

The feeling is very surreal right now, even though I have access to the web site and can look at Fall 2008 classes; I really feel like someone is playing a joke on me. (I will stuck otter pops up their butts if they are *insert shaking fist*.)

The best part of today, besides getting accepted to grad school, a celebratory coke slurpee, or the hiding of my phone in the ceiling much like The Office, was telling my dad. He got emotional as he told me he was glad I wasn't going too far away.

It's nice to be loved so much.

Farewell, adios, and, as always, spooning leads to forking.