The Economy Scares the Hell Outta Me

It's been a couple of weeks since the $700 billion dollar bailout fellow-Americans (I think, but I really don't want to go find the exact date right now.) When I get on MSN.com, which is pretty much everyday, I am chagrined, nervous, and disappointed when I see that the DOW and NASDAQ continue to appear in red numbers - a color that should not be associated with the economy everyday.

The purpose for this post... well, there are many purposes. For me, the economy is like politics is like a bad, awkward date - I close my eyes, continue to not acknowledge it's effects on me, and pray to God someone better will come along and fix it. The economy scares the hell outta me because I don't know anything about it, or how it will effect me. I've been content to not know and have foolishly believed that many people on Wall-Street were working for the greater good. I don't have much money in savings accounts and money market mutual funds, so how could I really be affected? But, there comes a time when a woman must grow some ova and step up to understand her surroundings and how current events are shaping her future. (Grburbank reminded me of this in my comments a few posts back.)

If you want to become more well-versed in the current economic crisis AND know where to put your blame, here are a two links I found very, very helpful:

This American Life's "Another Frightening Show About the Economy"

This episode, about 58 minutes long (just click on the "full-episode" button), succinctly explains who is to blame (both Repbulicans and Democrats and all the people in-between), what these crazy "credit-default swaps" are, and other useful information, like what you can be doing for yourself. Listening to this podcast really, really helped make me aware and more educated - plus, you should just listen to TAL because it's amazing and free.

New York Times "Wall Street Bailout Plan Q and A"

This is a pretty short article, and doesn't have all the snazz that TAL does, but it explains some pretty big concepts.

Now. Can I rant? Yes. Yes I can. Although I still don't understand all the problems in the economy and have surely forgotten some things since I listened to TAL's podcast, I do get some things - like why John McCain and Barack Obama should shut up and stop pointing fingers and provide solutions because BOTH of their parties are to blame. On top of that, we, as contributors to the economy, need to step up and take some blame too. For far too long, Americans have lived on credit, lived beyond their means, - like buying houses that are too big, too expensive, and take up too many natural resources - and gambled with money on what has to be a "sure thing." There ain't no thang as a sure thang and this current crisis is a wake up call to that.

Who else is upset that this bailout is based on our tax money? That's right, the government, who does not get involved with public entities and private corporations, is using our money to save CEO's and fat cats who used too much credit - a basically non-existent form of exchange - to buy more and more and then crashed and burned? I'm pissed. Then to top that off, everyone says it's going to get worse before it gets better and if we, as "the small American", haven't really felt the effects yet, what's going to happen in a few months or years? I really don't want to think about it.

(Other things that bother me right now - why does the government have to buy stocks in companies? Socialism anyone? Why do we only have TWO options for president? Shouldn't we have more, well-backed party supported candidates? Silly anyone? Why do I keep getting fever blisters? Am I that stressed? Bah!)

So, if you've read this far, please take time to educate yourself - the act of doing so is empowering, even though it can feel like a risk. If you're an economist or smart business person or smarter or more educated than I am person who's read this far, please give feedback.

Backstage Passes

Tonight I went to my first ska concert. Ever. This is weird because I'm quite the concert goin' fool and I've loved ska since high school. Oh, the days when all the kids would dance to "Dopeman" by Less Than Jake seem so long ago. 

Anyways, that is not the point of this little post. The point is - I got to be backstage and I've never been backstage before either.

I've always envied those backstage people who are coyly hanging out on the wings of the stage waiting for the band to end. I assumed that those lucky people are kickin' it with the band and having far more romantic and adventurous lives than I will ever lead. 

I have to tell you, as I stood on the wings of the stage tonight, half hidden by the lights and and curtains, I felt so freaking cool. That's right. Cool. Perhaps I understand the appeal of being the guard at the panopticon, or perhaps I've just paid my concert dues and made it to where the cool kids hang out, but I'd definitely love to be backstage again... especially at the Bouncing Souls concert I'm going to in a few weeks.

The Mad Caddies surely know how to rock the house and be attractive at the same time. Thanks, Cynthia! for my first ska/backstage experience all in one.

Here's a video from the Mad Caddies if you like ska or just want to know what you've been missing out on; the next video is from my most favorite ska band, The Killing Moon. If you have any suggestions on sweet trumpeting bands I'm missing out on, please let me know!

Breast Cancer Capitolism

As most of you good citizens know, October is Breast Cancer Awareness month - yes the month of pink ribbons, pink bracelets, and sometimes, pink t-shirts. Now, as a disclaimer for what follows, I in no way mean to disrespect cancer victims, survivors, or research, nor do I mean to implicate my criticisms in conjunction with the loss or heartache someone experiences when they, or a loved one, deals with cancer. However, this month, I am upset, irritated, and tired of seeing pink whenever I walk into Target.

Let me start from the beginning. My family has a long history of cancer. Two of my uncles have died from skin cancer and numerous other family members, including my mom and grandpa, have dealt with benign to malignant types of cancer. Cancer has been a big part of my life, and it is something that I worry about anytime one of us gets a terrible sunburn.

A few weeks ago, an officemate, whom I love and adore, brought a pink Breast Cancer awareness oven timer to work. My other officemate and I remarked on how neat it was, and remembered that it was time to kick off our own cancer awareness. (The oven timer was eventually going to be used in class for timing activities.) 

When I went to Target later that same day, I was struck by the vastness of Target's Breast Cancer awareness, even though it was only late September. There were pink brooms and cleaning supplies, pink pots and oven mitts, pink purses, totes, and manicure sets, pink egg beaters, even pink Brita water filters.

This is when my agitation surfaced. Now. I am all for cancer research and raising money, and if this is the only research can get funds, then so be it. But the fine makers of the Brita water filter are most likely not concerned with how many women OR men are helped with their oh-so-altruistic efforts, they are most likely concerned with how many people are paying $24.99 for  a Brita water filter... and the profits reaped therein. Are we really to the point in this country that we believe a company marketing a pink broom really cares about research, or do we understand that a company has decided to tap into a very lucrative market?

I am infuriated to think that just because something pink appears on shelves in October we should buy it because we are "socially aware." (I am equally irritated at the marginalization of all things "going green" because it's good business.)

I will conceit, though, that some of these companies must have a good motive because I know there are many, many good people in the world, but when was the last time a ginormous corporation cared about one person, let alone a minority of people suffering from a disease. Doesn't the recent $700 billion dollar bailout speak volumes about the actual concerns of fat cats?

And let me get back to this broom business, because like hell I'm done ranting. A quick search on Target.com for "breast cancer" yielded 115 results. After the fifth page of results, I ran across what I would define as five - 5 - "male gendered" products, including pink gardening shears, a pink tool set, and a Madden Football game with pink packaging compared to the 15 other results per page dealing with womanly products. How does a "Fox Run Breast Cancer Awareness Baking Set" for $14.99 help people become aware of the fact that breast cancer is an unyielding beast?! Why are most of the products geared towards stereotypical, archaic women's roles? Men have mothers, sisters, girlfriends, and women in their lives. Can they not be aware? Why do we even have to have pink as the color? Because only girls like pink? Men can get breast cancer. Should they have to identify with a pink ribbon? On that note, why don't we have a Testicular Cancer awareness month? Cancer is not indicative to the female species. Bah!

What I'm really getting at here is that consumers should not feel morally obligated to buy pink products in October OR feel P.C. because they have done so. If people want to contribute to cancer awareness, why not do so directly on web-sites and bypass companies whose main goal is more money in already bulging pockets?

Are we more worried with having a pink broom so that when neighbors come over they see we are "aware," or are we worried about the disease? (I ask myself this question because I really, really wanted the pink pots.) I think that most of us consumers really want to help with cancer research and this may be the only way we know how; these are just recent thoughts on motives for doing so. If you are the person who purchases pink products because you are a good person and know you ARE helping someone, please continue to do so because the world really needs people like you, especially right now.

Any thoughts on this are more than welcome. I would love some feedback... because, really, I could be wrong.

No Longer on the Cusp of an Anxiety Attack

I know. Yay me!!! Right? Life is beginning to even out and I know longer have t

he feeling that suddenly life will implode.

Okay. Long time since my last post. But now I know why C.

 Joe was flustered for much of the past two years. Grad school is tough. I want to cry a lot. I want my mommy and a blankie and the amount of coke slurpees I ingest on a weekly basis has increased since that fateful day I found the Maverick in West Flag.

Here's a quick update on life, as I'm sure in future posts I'll return to those rants you all know and love so well.

Since being in Flagstaff, I've turned into quite the party trick. And no, not that way. I'm quite the Mormon enigma in the English department. Here's a list of things that have been said to me:

"You're Mormon?! But... you seem so sane."

"You're Mormon?! But you dress normal... and you're cute."

"I knew this Mormon once. Yeah... he/she was awful/terrible/judgmental." (To which I responded, "Yeah. Me too.")

"Are you Irish? Oh no. You can't be Irish. You're Mormon."

"Yeah. One time, on Wikipedia, my brother changed all the L.D.S. entries to read L.S.D." (Admittedly, I chuckled at this one, and then used it to show that Wikipedia is NOT a credible source.)

"So how many sister wives do you have?"

"All Mormons do is spawn, Spawn, SPAWN!" (This last one being said in front of my entire Sex, Politics, and Reproduction class. Everyone, including my professor, started laughing. Then it was pointed out that I was Mormon. It was worse than the time I was asked if Mormons have horns.)

Besides all of these comments, and the others like it, stem from ignorance, they have been opportunities for me to stand up for myself and reaffirm my faith. I've been struggling with my membership in the church for about the past year, and it's nice to finally know that I do believe, otherwise, I wouldn't say anything at all. 

I would also like to point out that these thoughtless, unlearned comments are of the minority. Most of my friends, which is why they are labeled thus, are curious and supportive and wonderful. I go out to the bars to socialize and dance, and they buy me drinks in the form of cranberry juice. They understand my informed decisions just like I understand theirs. 

So, here's the part where I break the flow and do a quick rapid fire. 

I haven't liked living in Flag. I have not liked going to school. I miss home and my family. 

I went home this past weekend for the first time in two months. I almost cried when I got to Cedar. Through conversations with wonderful people, I realized that I could either wallow in my pity, or I could do something about it. 

I got back to Flag on Monday, which was my 23rd birthday. I felt refreshed and recharged and ready to apply myself with a new fervor. I only have three semesters left after this one, so I might as well make them worth it. 

When I went out with some friends Monday night to celebrate my exit from my mother's womb, for the first real time since moving here, I felt loved. There's a lovely group of ladies in my program and we lunch every Friday after class. A few of them came out to dinner and it was great. Since I returned, I realized I have not made a wrong decision. I made a decision that put me in a challenging, new position and I must act and adapt instead of react and whine.

The point is this: we may not be in the best of circumstances, but this is it, so why not smile and decide to be happy?

Anyways. Parting shots:

Listen to Explosions in the Sky. The song "Your Hand in Mine" might just change your life.

Spending a birthday at the Dinosaur Museum in Lehi is a fantastic way to celebrate life.

Being a teacher is the best job EVER! Especially when a student tells you you're kick-ass.

I think I like being Mormon.

Kissing is awesome!

Frisco Street Grill is my new, favorite restaurant. Come visit! I'll take you there.

Raft down the Grand Canyon. It's phenomenal.