She or He?

I don't know what it is lately, but I find myself looking at the structure of the romantic languages and finding that they are completely set up for a patriarchy. This is not what annoys me though because I've always sub-consciously been aware of this fact. What annoys me is that I try to explain my frustrations to other people, women included, and they look at me like I'm unbearably dim-witted. I think what actually hurts my feelings more than these people thinking I'm an idiot is that they really, genuinely don't give a rat's ass.

It annoys me when my mom and I go to the cinema and the high school boy taking tickets says, "Hey guys. How are you tonight?" Okay, he's being polite - but we are NOT guys, we are girls, women, ladies, etc. I'm not saying that I corrected the kid, although my mom did, I'm saying that if I were the one taking tickets and I had said, "Oh haaaaay ladies!" to him and his buddies, there would have been irritated looks cast in my general direction.

I brought this up at work, not to make a point but because someone coincidentally asked me. I was talking to five other males and they thought I was crazy. Their responses varied between, "Well, 'guys' is just a way to say people, " and, "Well, if you're going to be irritated about being 'guys' you'd have to be irritated about being called a 'woman' or 'human' because it has 'man' in it." Suffice it to say, I either did not articulate myself clearly enough or my concerns fell on deaf ears, but my point was not internalized -at all.

The paramount annoyance occurred today in my Educational Block when a guy who looks like he should be in "Deliverance," not education, got upset because he was reading an article about the effects of personality disorders in the classroom. The subject of the article who was supposed to represent all students was continually referred to as "he." The male in my class actually asked, "Hey. Is there some gender discrimination going on here?" - EXACTLY! I can't remember the last time I heard anyone stop and pose this question when the subject representing all is a "he" and there are positive attributes applied to that "he." Singular pronouns are now "he or she" for a reason - to start being more equal in language, and not just when one gender is being misrepresented.

I would love to say that men just don't understand. But that's completely false. I know plenty of men who would agree with me, not because they're feminists, but because they understand how linguistics structures are created and often, the male is privileged in speech and writing. I just wish there were more of those men here so that when I speak up, I'm not labeled as some crazy, misguided feminist.

I'm not saying I'm going to change an entire linguistic system, or correct someone, male or female, when they call my mom and me "guys," but I'm just asking that people realize what they are saying and why they are saying it. I'm a girl, not a guy dammit.